Our Little Gilligan

Is so much fun! This Thursday she'll be 15 weeks old and man on man is it flying! Now that she has good head control we are facing forward in the Baby Bjorn and it has opened up a whole new world for us! Now we're taking afternoon and weekend morning strolls and she loves to just look around. She's WAY more happy in her car seat which lets us use the stroller sometimes 2-3 times a day and yesterday on the way home from a friend's house she just chatted it up with me the whole time in the backseat! Tony and I were in LOVE listening to her laugh and talk to us.

Sleep-eh, we've had some regression but it's not her fault. Because of her reflux she had been sleeping in her swing to keep her head elevated at night. She was sleeping from 8pm-2am and then about 2:45-5am and then 5:30-6:45. She has sadly outgrown the swing for comfy sleep so we've transitioned her into her big girl crib. The past two nights she's woken up either at 1am or 12:30 and the rest of the night has been off and on, but we know it'll take some getting used to. She's busting out of her swaddle at night and we've found her sleeping in the silliest positions.

It is true what they say-the sleep-not so predictable and there are days where I'm so tired that I feel drunk. Seeing her smile and listening to her talk and play make it all melt away and the energy comes from some unknown source. However, with that said, we are looking forward to the night where our little angel sleeps for a longer stretch.

She's taking about 6 ounces every 3 hours with a longer stretch at night. She's a little chunky monkey with a full little tummy!

It's crazy that this time last year her room was unpainted and empty, but God was giving her life and we were unaware. Each day life without her gets a little foggier and foggier and I look forward to all the days to come with her. She makes us laugh, makes us cry, and makes every day different.

I ordered this book from Scholastic during one of my last book orders and it is a favorite of ours already. We love reading this one to her, although we have yet to make it through the book without a few tears. It is so beautiful and here is a passage from it:

“Someday, a long time from now, your own hair will glow silver in the sun. And when that day comes, love, you will remember me.”

We're so blessed to be with her!

Tummy Time

Now by no means do I expect people to watch my baby do tummy time for 2:31 seconds. This is for our family that reads our blog. This is a pretty accurate display of tummy time at our house-right down to me censoring my language with her.

Happy 3 Months Emmy!

Today our sweet baby girl turns 3 months. It's hard to believe that 12 weeks ago I checked in for an induction and anxiously waited to meet our baby girl. The past 12 weeks have been a whirlwind where some of the days drag on but the weeks fly by. At 3 months Emmy is now attempting to sit up on her own and we're practicing pull ups a few times a day to encourage this.

She is taking tummy time a little better each day which is nice because we can now accomplish this important exercise for a few minutes before the crying sets in. During tummy time she rolls over quite a bit. She is also starting to scoot during this time as well. If it leads to crawling, well mommy won't push it. I've learned that Emmy will do what she wants when she is ready.

Bath time is still my favorite time of the day. We sing, talk about our days, and it always ends with a massage and bottle. Most nights she makes it through with a smile, but if we're running close to the last feeding of the night she tends to fuss during massage time. The girl is a big eater! She's eating about 4 ounces every 3 hours and right now usually sleeps from 8pm-1:45am then 2am-5am and 5:30am-7am. I have no clue how much she weighs and won't know until her 4 month appointment, but girlfriend is ready for size 2 diapers. She has outgrown her 0-3 month pjs and most of her 3 month pjs so I guess we're onto 3-6 month ones. Wow!

Our lives have forever changed and I find myself praying for this little one throughout the day. I wonder who she'll become, if she's happy, if we're doing enough for her, or pushing her too much. I look at each of my students and now see what their parents wish for them and push myself to be a better techer to them because I know their parents are wondering what they're doing and if they are being pushed enough or too much also. Someone at work said I came back a changed person and at first it hurt my feelings. Then I realized, yes I have changed. I've changed for good and I've left behind lots of selfishness that was never good for me from the start. My goal now is to do my best at work and then rush to be with Emmy and I think that's exactly how God intends it to be. Meeting her has been a huge blessing and comes with responsibilities that we don't take lightly.

Emmy we're so blessed to have you in our lives. Thank you for picking us for this wonderful journey called life. We hope to be amazing tour guides and we've already learned so much love and life from you.

This Face

This face is growing so fast! This face is making raspberries, cooing, laughing, and smiling more and more each day. This face is following along with us more and more as we read to her. This face is starting to accept tummy time just a little bit longer each day. This face now seems to realize that Einstein exists. This face is soaking in EVERY.LITTLE.THING. This face is a lot of work, but oh so worth it. This face was made with love.

1 Month!

**Disclaimer on typos: I'm still surviving on small chunks of sleep. This post will have lots of grammatical errors and typos.**

1 month. It always flies by on our dry erase calendar in our closet. It's crazy how fast a month can seem and how a month in a baby's life can completely change them. In one month our lives have been completely changed as well. There have been fabulous days and there have been days where we literally just take them one feeding at a time and one rocking at a time. So far I have kept my goal of showering every day (I dream big!) and thanks to a wonderful husband, I have also kept my goal of cooking real meals during the week. Some nights this has just been pasta and marinara sauce with a salad, but it feels good to know that we're not just eating take out during this crazy time. Meal planning in the past has definitely helped us make this possible. Bigger meals are now cooked on Sundays and faster things happen at the end of the work week. She has taken my planning skills to the next level!

Emmy has completely changed from the day we met her. As each day passes her focus on objects increases. She regularly holds her head up for longer periods of time, and she's starting to coo on occasion. Her attention span has increased as well and she's starting to want to spend more time laying on her back just looking around. Most of the time when she wakes up there is about a 5 minute window of happiness before she lets us know she's ready to eat. Sometimes though, that window is longer and she's fun to just talk to while she's hanging out on the changing table. Last night we read her a short story during her last feeding before bed and I found her following along to the page I would point to. This is something that did not happen last week and we think it's pretty awesome.

She tends to fight sleep during the day and the only reason we can think of her doing this is because there's so much for her to look around and see now. At times this can be frustrating, because a tired baby is not a happy one, but prayer gets us through these moments. She's starting to really focus on Einstein and if he gets too close to her she swats him with her flying hands!

I always knew I wanted to be a mom and have a family. When Tony and I met and started dating, we knew we had the same goals in life. He really looked forward to being a father and a husband and I could tell by his patience and kindness that he would be a fabulous one. Family is everything to him. We have spent a great deal of time this past month just reviling in what God has blessed us with-the great, the tough, and the poopy. All the time we both spent growing up and imagining getting married, owning a home, and having a family we never knew exactly what it would look like. It's not always easy, it's not always fancy or "exciting" as most would classify, but it's the coolest thing we've ever done. When she naps at night or during the weekend we have fun spending time together just he and I-whether it be catching up on tv shows or just talking. When Emmy was 1-2 weeks old this wasn't even possible and I remember crying to him that we were never going to have time together again. I'm thankful for my good friends and the advice they gave me to just hang in there. It does get better-sometimes so slowly that if you're stuck in the middle of it you almost don't even notice it. Each day she shows us just a little bit more of her independence. I can tell she's going to be a fiery one like her momma and this slightly terrifies me...

Here are pictures of her milestones this month.

birthday

1 week old

2 weeks old

3 weeks old

4 weeks old

I can't believe how much she's changed! I'm so thankful to be a part of her life. In the one month since I've had the pleasure of meeting her-I've changed. I now know the momma bear feeling my mom always described when raising me. I feel instant guilt when I leave her for even an hour. I wish I could take every pain away from her and I want to show her the world all at once while protecting her from ever feeling pain. One month in I can feel a strong love that I worried in the beginning wouldn't come so quickly. I look at her and see both her father and I and that is enough to know I will always protect her. One month in and I know that my most important job in life is to make sure she is a good and loving person-someone who makes other people feel better just by being around her. I want her to be an honest and giving person-someone who isn't blinded by nice things and the desire to be popular-but rather, someone that feels for people and wants to give back. I have so many hopes for her and I know in my heart I have to be the best version of myself every day for this to reflect in her. It's a crazy feeling that creeped up on me one feeding at a time, one lullaby at a time, and one diaper change at a time.

Life on the other side

Well we did it! We made it to life on the other side with Emmy. Today she is three weeks old and wow, have these 3 weeks been a learning experience. In honor of her three week birthday here are three things I have learned:


1. Who you marry defines what kind of life you will have. I have found that Tony is the single most selfless, patient, and loving man I know. He doesn't think twice about night time feedings, holding Emmy when she's crying in his arms for long periods of time, or walking the dog/making breakfast/feeding her a bottle/changing her diaper/and encouraging me all before 6am. God did so good when he brought him to me. I have fallen in love with this man harder and harder each day.



2. No book can compare you for being a new mom. You can reference Google 50 times in one day, talk to 5 different moms, read "your baby this week" again and again and you will still just have to go it alone in some cases. I've learned a little bit of fear is great-a lot of fear will cripple you. I'm FINALLY starting to learn that these things are all good guides, but sometimes you just have to back away and figure it out on your own.



3. No one can prepare you for what kind of love you will feel for your baby. It takes time to develop this relationship and I am completely ok with that. It is a mostly give (on my end) and take (on her end) relationship in the beginning and this will break your selfish ways one cry at a time. Tony and I will finally sit down to start a show we've recorded days ago and the second it starts so will she. It is a sharp contrast to life before Emmy, but we're learning not just to adjust, but to embrace it. Sometimes I watch her as she sleeps and just whisper to her how excited I am to know her and show her this world. We have so much to learn together as a family and I could not be more thrilled.

Bits and Pieces of Emmy's Room

We're still missing a few details like her teddy bear hammock above the twin bed that will hold all her stuffed animals and a few white floating shelves to hold family pictures, but that will all come with time. For the most part, it's done and we're happy with the outcome. We like how simple and calm it feels. No need for a bright and loud room for Ms. Emmy!

Einstein loves to jump all over this bed!

Changing station...

Tony and I fell in love with these little guys. When we were building our home we walked into Emmy's room one day and a huge white owl was flying around the room. We thought it was only fitting to have a few cute owls keeping an eye on her.

Cute art near the door.

Bed skirt made by my wonderful mom!

Her name painted by her daddy and I. Funny how the color of the room can change with certain angles.